And what about the men?
While talking about prostitution, sex workers are often the focus. Meanwhile the customers of sex work, mostly men, stay invisible. Quotes of these customers, which were posted to infamous forums about prostitution, prove that sex work is not about love or affection, but rather about dominance and force. Through the purchase of sex work, the woman becomes an object for sexual desire. This conception is dangerous, because objects are not expected to have human feelings. The possibility of sexual violence increases. 39% of men in Germany think that the purchase allows them to do whatever they want to these women. Especially if the sex worker does not meet the expectations of her customer, rape is seen as inevitable and legitimate. Over one third of men does not view these circumstances in prostitution as rape and belive that sex workers are “not able to be raped”.
With objectification and a consumer mentality, women are dehumanized and reduced to certain body parts that are of use to these men. Women are robbed of their personality and dignity. The customers of sex work view these woman as “inferior” because they are poor in most cases and belong to certain marginalized groups of minorities. Racist and ethnic stereotypes play an important role in the selection of their sex worker of choice. German customers adopt a racist hierarchy based on skin color, which is supported by certain filter options on numerous online portals. Overall one can say that the preference for impersonal sex, like in prostitution, is connected to a higher possibility of sexual offenses, ranging from sexual assault up to rape incidents - not only on prostitutes.
A lot of sex work customers notice, that women in prostitution are suffering mentally and physically and are not able to show their feelings vulnerably. The phenomenon of dissociations is often reported by customers. But they do not care about the well-being of sex workers and obviously lack the empathy to do so. The violence and suffering of prostitution is often minimized by these men, because they think that they can compensate for the destruction that they are causing with their payment. Some even think they offer these women a possibility of work and therefore are doing something good for them. The case of a murdered prostitute in Koblenz in December 2023 is significant. According to media reports, the woman's body had numerous broken bones and traces of physical violence. Did the clients, whom the woman had to receive despite her injuries, really not notice any of this - or did they not want to see it?
The majority of sex work customers are aware that human trafficking and pimping are present in prostitution. Many of them have already witnessed violent offenses against a sex worker. It is therefore all the more incomprehensible why they are hardly willing to inform the authorities if they suspect human trafficking. There are only a few known reports of sex work customers, although the legality of prostitution means that such a report poses no legal risk to the men - on the contrary, the men are punishable by law if they buy sexual services from trafficked persons despite knowing better.
Reem Alsalem, the UN Special Rapporteur on violence against women and girls, draws attention to the connection between prostitution and pornography. The violent fantasies shown in pornographic material are sometimes acted out in prostitution and the boundaries between sex and sexualised violence are blurred. It is therefore worrying that boys in particular have a high level of porn consumption in their early teens.
